I want you to know...

Depression is a big part of who I am now. Whether I like it or not, I have to carry this 'burden' with me for life. I'm learning to live with this illness, but I'm not going to let it control my life. Does that make sense? 

I came across this article on Facebook. Titled 3 Things the Chronically Ill Wish their Loved ones knew.  It is worth the read, but I'm going to add to it. I'll list the three things the article has and then add to the list (my additions will be in red). 

1. The grief we feel over the life we’ve lost may re-emerge now and then…indefinitely. Depression has changed me. I will never be the same person I was 7 years ago. I've learned to live with that change, but occasionally I will mourn for what I have lost. Please try to understand that. 
2. We can feel as if we’re letting you down even though you’ve repeatedly told us that we’re not. Don't push me into doing or joining in on the fun. I will join in activities, but I must feel "up to it." It needs to be on my terms. Just let me know that you understand I can't join you. 
3.  Being chronically ill can be embarrassing. I want to share with you what I am going through, but I am afraid of how you will react. Will you treat me differently? Will what I have told you affect our relationship/friendship? While I know most of my friends would love me anyway, there is always that nagging feeling that they won't. I will be left with no friends and no support. 
4. Piggybacking off of #3...When I do decide to tell you, don't make light of it. It will be hard for me to confide in you, so I just need you to listen. 
5. I expect you to ask questions, because you will not understand everything I'm going through. But, don't expect me to share everything with you. 
6. Please keep what I've told you to yourself. I understand this is hard to hear. Depression is a heavy subject, and I've just told you some pretty heavy stuff. But, I would appreciate you keeping it to yourself.